Monday, April 23, 2012

IS THIS NORMAL?


Ermm...how do I start this eh.. Lately i have this feelings yg xbrape best.. i mean, mixed feelings of macam2 lah.. tetibe mcm terover-emo pun ade, but since i nie jenis pendam so i makan hati je la..or nangis sorang2 before tido..huhu..  kadang2 mcm terpikir gak, adakah ini normal after u get married? i do hope yg da kawen tu bleh tlg i.. and yg blum kawen tu, maybe u all can make this post as ur reference for life after married…
 
OF BABIES
 supercute babiessss... ;)

Oppsss jgn salahsangka yer, I blum preggy lagi..korang niee, ishh.. 
My story nie a bit different dgn b2b yg lain, mostly share pasal dah preggy or share about being pressured by others..  Hurmm walaupun for me it’s too early to talk about babies sbb baru je 2months plus kawen (da nak masuk 3bulan pon-still feeling2 pengantin baru haha ;p )  BUT, i xtau l whhhyyyy  laaaaa im pressuring myself to have a baby.. I dah tried my best to relax n chill, but bila feeling2 sakit or b4 dtg period,  i akan trus beli pregnancy test n hoping I am pregnant..  tapi bila tgk result -ve, i akan kecewa giler..

My hubby ckp xpe jgn pressure or letak harapan..tapi tu lah, kite luaran je ckp " eh xde letak harapan pun", tapi dalam hati? Mmg sumer org ckp relax dulu, honeymoon dulu, kumpul duit dulu.. but for me i rasa mcm xleh nak relax and xleh nak tunggu kot, cos i ni da la kawen lambat (late 20s).. And now im already 29.. yep 29 OK?! Worst part, i only have 1ovary-first time kena ovarian cyst at age 24. It was really bad so they have to remove my left ovary.... sedey x.. T_T papepun i terima and redha dgn ketentuan Allah.. Alhamdulillah I ada satu lagi ovary yg masih berfungsi, tapi problem gak sbb last year detect ada cyst gak tp kecik2 je la… my gynea (doctor pakar perempuan) ckp my ovary n telur ‘sleeping’ T_T  So I terpaksa makan ubat and hormone pills untuk stabilize my hormone sepanjang tahun okeh… tu yg xkurus2 tu..hmmph! 

I rasa dgn keadaan camnie, chances i berbanding ngan u alls sgt2222 lah low..  untuk dptkan baby I ada brape percent jer to conceive.. tu yg risau tu...Kdg2 i betul2 mengharap dpt baby cepat, kot2 lepas ni dah xleh dah? how....? Betul lah i ni mcm meng-pressure kan diri sendri je kan..? hahaa.. Family n org lain xde la plak desak2.. ;p hubby pun xde la desak, but mmg la teringin kan.... so camne nak kawal emosi nih? Huhuhuhuuuuu T_T

Is this normal?

P/S : Please check with your specialist/gynea whether you have ovarian cyst onot…. Kadang2 the symptoms mmg mcm xde pape.. And based on the internet and doctors, ovarian cyst ni adalah normal dikalangan remaja and young adults..Even time pregnant pun bleh dpt.. So note from me, sila check ya sebelum terlambat….. T_T

OF ALL THE SMALL THINGS
 kkrreow?

Okay this part..bukan nak buka aib, but i seriously wanna know if this is normal? Alhamdulillah lepas kawen, hidup sgt2 bahagia with org yg tersayang..  I think readers and those yg follow my blog nie, bleh nampak I punyer ke-excited-an nak kawen tu kan..hehe.. So bila da super excited,xsabar n gatai untuk kawen, sumer bende kite expect to be perfect. That’s my problem kot, expecting all to be perfect, bunga2, cintan-cintun golek2 ditaman lepas kawen. Note to all, we have to face the facts that not everything is perfect.. mesti adalah problems and mesti ada argument2 kecil in marriage life. Mmg org tua2 sumer dah pesan lepas kawen life akan lain, xmcm time couple sumernyerrr indah2 berbunga2.. Inilah namanye phase mengenali, where u live with dat person, eat with that person, etc,etc…sumer togeder2 sampaikan sumtimes small things yg dia buat u akan mcm eeeee..  xpasal2 my pet peeve is triggered n rase gerams..  Rasa mcm kelakar je bila pikir balik..hehe tapi nak wat camner kan? Mmg in marriage kena ada byk kompromi n byk22 sabar.. I think im ok with it, but my emotion je x (sumtimes).. whyyyyyy.. T_T 

Is this normal?

P/S: Sila dengar ye ckp org2 tua.. Mmg betul life after married is different.. Yes mmg bahagia, tapi ‘phase mengenali each other’ tu yg kena byk222 sabar…

OF FEELINGS
 saje letak pic ni sbb classic..! :D

Okay yg ni agak psycho… Lately nie sumtimes i feeling2 sorang2 before tido..serious sheep… I xtau nape.. ye la maybe ada la reason nye tu.. tapi bila duk sorang2, before tido tu,I akan ter-keluar air mata terkenangkan prob2 diatas tu..huhuuu..  pastu I akan marah pada diri sendri of not being a good wife..  I guess this is from my childhood n self esteem dari dulu cos I always think im not good enough or smart enough for anything..  And blaming myself for everything.. And not only that, i sumtimes teringatkan wedding preps n byk terpikir balik nape x buat ni?naper xbuat tu?naper last minute? naper adik xbuat tu?naper abg xbagi buat tu?blablabla n it continues on... T_T 
And sumtimes after kawen nie I rasa ala2 blues and sumtimes depressed…  But I don’t want to send a wrong message, Im happy to be married to my hubby..And I truly love n shayang my meowgagah…. but tu la nape la I ada feeling2 camni..? I seriously dun know how to handle this… T_T

Is this normal?

P/S: If anyone bleh share tips please do…for this one I mmg xtau nak buat apa.. T_T nak kena buat wedding lagi kot? Hehe ;p
   

meowluv~

20 comments:

Dalila dalila said...

hehe renee mmg obvious muka excited u tu..eheh so happy to hear that u r happy in ur marriage life..btw yg psl cyst tu..one of my fren pn pnh kena..and dr. dia suggest dia mkn apricot seed and olive oil..so everyday dia akan blend apricot seed+green apple+celery+timun+honey/lemon... and then dia mkn olive oil mcm tu je satu sudu..hehe she's getting better now..juz nk prevent from cyst tu active blk..but if u wanna confirm bout this u try la tny ur doc..take care babe..dun pressure urself..insyaAllah mst ada rzki u nnt to get cute babies like u..

Cik Lijah said...

renee....

i dl mcm ni gak awl2 kawen...in fact, a week after married da stress psl nak baby....u know why? i tak ramai cousin pompuan...but almost all my female cousins difficult to have baby....(ade yg almost 10 yrs still dont have baby..)...sampaikan ade yg kata keturunan pompuan kami ni mandul...huhu...very sad...(T_T)

so, slalu nightmare takleh have baby...dan mula bayangkan yg bukan2...(sejak awal 20-an lg..)

then, i terbaca satu hal ni dr buku....kena pasrah, kena byk berdoa dgn Allah..berserah sehabis2an dgnnya....

kdg2 kite diberi rezeki awal...kdg2 lewat sket...kdg2 tak diberi langsung....tp semuanya ade sebabnye...
Allah shj yg tau ape yg terbaik utk kite....Mungkin anak itu tak bw kebaikan utk kite kalo dpt skrg...

Alhamdulillah, after 5 weeks after married, i tau i pregnant 7 weeks...(bunting pelamin)....terkejut....tp syukur sgt...

The key is sentiasa berbaik sangka la....dan doa banyak2...insyaallah....

LisaLisut said...

i think its normal kot. sbb masa mula2 kawin pn aritu i ada simptom2 yg u mention tu. wpun tgh happy tp ade fasa2 depressed bagai. dont know why.myabe fasa adjusting to a new life kot? or myb bak kata husband i "i cpt boring" sbb masa 2bulan lps kawin i i kata i dh boring tatau nk buat apa.hahaha.masa bercinta dh kesana kemari kot.mybe sbb tu. kene cari something new to explore/to do la lps kawin.hehe

pasal pregnant tu no worries jgn stress. u pn br je lagi kan. to conceive x elok stress2 :) i am sure u dh dgr or baca psl ni kan b4 this. chill! :)

~ NANA ~ said...

*hugs*

i rasa normal je tu dear...bab pregnant tu, don't give up okey...amalkn minum habatussauda

Hunny Kitty said...

lepas kawen mmg kadang2 separuh2 org akan terlebeh sensitif berkenaan ngan certain2 things....well tambahan lagik ada yg tukang kipas bara2 api jadik bola2 api...well..rasanya tak de sapa terlepas dari perasaan mcm ni kot..kene tabah+positif (try to be positive)..n fikir secara matang.
well pasal bby tu..mmg otomatik dlm budaya kita ni dah di terap diajar ditrainning untuk sebuk nak amik tau org tu dah preggy ke belom ke ape ke. so ai rasa better u ckp "InsyaAllah...." tiap kali tny jawap je benda sama...mintak derang doakan skali..jgn jawap benda lain dah b enda sama je samapi derang pun boring dah nak tanya..hehehehehee.

hidup sama2 sebelom n selepas kawen mmg berlainan...sedangkan lidah lagi tergeget inikan pulak suami isteri. yup...gado2 manja adalah sebahagian dari proses mengenal hati budi dan jugak proses adaptasi sesama sendiri. kalao tak de gado2 manja kang tak besh lak....tapi kene handle things with care. baru ada manisnya di hujung gado2 manja tu..khen?

so jgn stress2....bila ada masa hv a beauty conversation between each other...korek citer2 lama yg leh dikorek n di ketawakan sama2..buat tu sebelom tido..mesti time tido sonok je...silap2 hari bulan salah sorang mesti terkantoi mengigau sbb xcited dek citer kenangan tu..mana la nak tau kan? hehehhee

so lalink..hadapi semuanya dengan senyuman....good luck!

xoxo

Hazz Nieza said...

i rasa pun normal je kot. perubahan persekitaran penyesuaian diri ke phase yg baru. boleh phm ke ayat i. hahahha. dont stress2 k, biasalah kita perempuan mmg suka byk brpkir. otak sentiasa memikirkan sesuatu. now dah settle hal wedding mulalah pikirkan benda2 lain pulak. try busykan diri, insyaAllah ;-))
bout cyst tu, my colleague ada sorg yg sama case mcm you. tggal 1 jer. but alhamdulillah, she now have 5 kids and bakal timang sorg lagi awal thn depan. berdoa byk2, tawakkal & redha. doakan yg baik2 tuk you dear! ;-))

choclairissa@intan marliana said...

rneee..i phm prsn u..am still trying too..yes its been a year..u seorang yg periang dear..jgn cpt putus asa..paling penting my advise jgn byk pk...yes sgt susah sbb i smp skrg pun pk..but what can i say is...u pk org lain yg lebih teruk dr u dear..bende tu akan buat kite strong..sila sabar dgn meowgagah for whateva reason..laki mmg cmtu kdg kdg xphm..live before n after kawen mmg lain :-) i doakan u k..kita sama sama usaha..nothing is impossible..yg penting kite sentiasa bersyukur n berubah menjadi lebih baik ke jln Allah :-)

lenepawida said...

Renee! just nak share this one story with you. a friend of mine, mak dia kena remove 1 ovary jugak, and the doc told her that she have less chance of conceiving.

but then, mak dia pregnant eventually and guess what, my friend punya adik beradik siap ada 5 orang lagi(with 1 ovary!) so it shouldn't be a problem insyaAllah. no worries okay Renee!

rezeki Allah yang bagi, doa banyak2 sebab Allah konfem akan kabulkan doa2 kita, cuma in what way, is it now or later, kita takkan tau. one of my fav verse: surah al Mukmin (surah 60, ayat 40) "dan Tuhanmu berfirman, berdoalah kepadaKu, nescaya akan Kuperkenankan bagimu.."

take care dearie! hugsss! :)

Maneesa said...

hi renee , bukan u sorang je rasa camni tapi orang lain pon ada juga , of the things u worried there are others also feel or thinking the same so don't worry i guess it is normal.
However , you will need to keep ur head up , talk more with ur husband let him understand what u are feeling coz u can't go tru this alone. Try not to think too much k :)
But just to inform u up-front , the side effect of taking hormone pills that were prescribe by ur gynea , bole buat u mood swing or too hormonal that you might think too much or benda yg xde nk sedih or upset or terfikir pon bole jadi. i experienced the same of having mood swings and hot flushes even bole nangis tetiba xde sebab.

Honey Sakura @ eiMyLiciOus said...

sayangggg...same goes to me now... :(

what to do....sob sob sob!!!!

Green Apel said...

normal kot, exactly same awal2 kawen kita dalam fasa mengenali, nak bagi serasi pun amik masa, tak semua yg kita expect masa bercinta dulu dilalui,insyallah kita sama2 bersangka baik pada Allah..amal solat dhuha n baca surah al-waqiah..kita hanya boleh berusaha,Allah akan tentukan terbaik utk kita..=))chill okei..

Mr.Ayu.Mrs.Rudy said...

hi sayang! count me in the same boat honey, because this is wat we call E.X.P.E.C.T.A.T.I.O.N.S... You're so happy but you still feel you're not doing enough... take ur time... you'll get use to it! Muah!

chenta nana said...

saya rasa normal kot. nana pun alami perkara sama. dan every month beli pregnacy test.... tapi result still (-ve)... takpe la... dugaan semua tu. yang penting kene sabar la

makcik rokiah said...

hye dear... i think its normal. baru kawen..byk bende nak cope so fikiran pun bercelaru... tak mao stress key kene ikut je..doa banyak2 insyaallah dipermudahkan..chill!

Reen Tart Nenas said...

takpe. memula stress pasal baby. tp insyallah takde apa2 la. rezeki tu Allah dah janjikan untuk kita. my advice, pls pls pls dont stress out ur self. rugi je. penat otak nanti. just pls pls enjoy ur life after married. sgt indah. pls share every moment together. pegi jalan2. xperlu bercuti jauh2, spend money too much, tp cukup sekadar pi piknik dekat2 ke weekend.
anak? sampai masa, insyallah ada. ya, senang bercakap, tp I dah rasa. so just pls enjoy your life now. try to be a good wife n muslimah too. insyallah semua ok :)

take care renee.

~misshuny~ said...

renee,hani pun sama cam renee..pas kawen nie lagi sensitf..emo jer..pantang ckp silap sket,mata trus berair..n time nk tdo pun kadang nangis....padahal hubby bergurau benda2 kecik jer...ingt ke hani sorang jer feeling cmni pas kawen...huhu

take care renee..banyak2 sabar k..=)

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Dell said...

Normal kot.
Dell masa mula2 pun macam tu.
Lagi teruk, Dell menangis teresak2. Sampai hidung tersumbat2. Bile nak tido je, air mata keluar .
And sama juga pasal wedding preps, banyak yang dell buat, sume tak jadi. Sampai menangis2 minta husband kawen lagi sekali . Rupa2 nya, Dell dah 7 weeks pregnant. sedangkan baru je 5 minggu kawen.. bunting pelamin.. Insya'Allah, banyakkan berdoa. jangan terlalu fikir.. takdir Allah tu akan tentukan lebih baik . **
* sini meh , peluk dell meh**

Renee Meow said...

sorry terlambat nk reply comments u all.. thanks so much for the support n tips my darlings..and tq doakan untuk i.. sayang korangs..!! *big group hug* :D

Little kelip-kelip said...

renee...i pn mcm u...walaupun masih baru lg kawen...almost 1month i kawen...but i teruja sgt nk ada bby..lg2 bile fasha sndha pregg...lg la terasa coz my wedding same ngan dia...huhu...i sgt2 pressure,asyik2 nk carik info psal nk cpt pregnant..huhu...stress je,tp kwn2 i ckp tu normal..kita kan tfikir bnda2 tu semua lg2 bile kita kawen agak lewat..huhu...pape2 pun renee,kita sama2 la mengcoolkan diri...just enjoy ms kita ngan hubby..insyyallah benda2 tu aku pergi sendiri,wlpun bnda2 itu smua akn ttp mghantui kita..huhu...neway rinee...KITA ENJOY :)